I am sitting in the waiting area of the Belin-Blank Center Clinic as BigGuy does his second (and last) day of psychoeducational testing.

The trip alone with him has definitely shown me some things…

First, a peek at his responses on his “self-report” questionnaires of various types show that he thinks Husbeau and I love him, listen to him and help him when he asks.  That was a huge relief to see given that he often has a horribly negative outlook on life a lot of the time.

Second, I realized just how much he is still a little boy.  Whether it’s just his developmental speed or it’s the Asperger’s that may keep him there, my guy still wants to hold my hand in public and likes having me nearby.  Part of me wonders if this might partly be the anxiety issues I suspect he is having, too.

Last, he has some real ideas in there. My preoccupation with my own problems often tune out his CONSTANT. CONSTANT. babbling on about things instead of focusing on what he’s saying. I’m missing out; and now I’m aching for what HE has missed of my attention and how that might be feeding some of these issues.

I also noticed his negative responses toward “school”.  That was shocking since he drives the boat there. I also noticed that he changed several of those responses this morning–which was weird.  It happened after I got annoyed with him for getting sucked into his NOOK and not putting his shoes on when we really needed to go.  I honestly thought he was going to change some parent-related responses but he changed SCHOOL-related responses and he made them less negative. Hunh…

Ultimately, we hope that all of this testing today will guide us in knowing how to help him be happier and more independent.

We have been down this road before. We know the “experts” are not ALWAYS right. But I do have some high hopes for these evaluations giving us what we need–or at least give us something to dig deeper into or a direction for more research.

Hoping you are finding resources for your challenges. ❤